http://www.readingbus.co.uk/ReadingBusBlog/archives/565 The Reading Bus Blog features the writing of the community of Reading Bus users in Aberdeen, Scotland. Fri, 18 May 2012 13:13:03 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.5.1 http://www.readingbus.co.uk/ReadingBusBlog/archives/565#comment-5554 Moira Mon, 30 Apr 2007 20:02:14 +0000 http://www.readingbus.co.uk/ReadingBusBlog/?p=565#comment-5554 I loved the descriptive language in the beginning of your story. When I was reading I quickly got into your story imagining Bobo in his caravan in the woods. It would be great if you could find time to look at the action of your story again and build up some suspense to the fight with the wolf. I loved the descriptive language in the beginning of your story. When I was reading I quickly got into your story imagining Bobo in his caravan in the woods.
It would be great if you could find time to look at the action of your story again and build up some suspense to the fight with the wolf.

]]> http://www.readingbus.co.uk/ReadingBusBlog/archives/565#comment-5546 Jenny Mon, 30 Apr 2007 19:52:06 +0000 http://www.readingbus.co.uk/ReadingBusBlog/?p=565#comment-5546 I thought your introduction was great - you built up some really good detail about Bobo and his caravan. The ending seemed very quick - perhaps you could have put in some more detail? Glad it was a happy ending though and that Bobo did not get eaten! Well done I thought your introduction was great - you built up some really good detail about Bobo and his caravan. The ending seemed very quick - perhaps you could have put in some more detail?
Glad it was a happy ending though and that Bobo did not get eaten!
Well done

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