The Flashbacks (A Sequel to The Castle Loch)
February 5th, 2007
It’s been three years since the train crash. I have never been near water or a train since but today I was. The class are going to Edinburgh on a train and then we are going swimming.
On the train I kept seeing all the people that died. I told my teacher. She told me to calm down. So I tried to sleep but the people kept coming. When we got there I was scared of the pool. But I got changed and then I saw all the faces of the people.
I was terrified. I got into the pool slowly and tried to swim. I swan under water. Then I saw the train under water. I got out and my class started to laugh at me for screaming. So I got back in and kept on swimming. I felt someone grab my leg. I saw the old man who had done it to me, but he was dead, so I shook my head to see if it was real and saw Tom the bully. I shook him off and swam out.
The train back home was crowded but I managed to fall asleep. Back at the station I saw the castle and screamed, no one knew why but the person who sat next to me three years ago did…
By Sean P7
Entry Filed under: Hanover Street
22 Comments Add your own
1. Andy | February 8th, 2007 at 9:29 am
A scary story, Sean Well done!
2. Jenny | February 8th, 2007 at 8:36 pm
What a great story - I’m glad you carried on writing and added a sequel! Superb descriptions - I really felt scared and as if I was sitting on that train.
Can we have another sequel please - I want to read more!
Jenny
3. Russell | February 13th, 2007 at 3:43 am
That was an amazing sequel… I was riveted too. I really felt I went on a journey with you.
When I read
I wasn’t sure who you shook off, Tom or the dead man… but maybe that was the effect you wanted. I’d be interested to read more about this ‘Tom the bully’.
4. Kyle and Owen | February 13th, 2007 at 9:41 am
We liked your beginning of the story and you carried it on very well. It was a very good story and we liked it a lot.
5. darren | February 13th, 2007 at 9:45 am
That was a very good story Sean and it was very interesting to hear what happened.I liked the bit where you described the words .
6. Kyle and Owen | February 13th, 2007 at 9:45 am
We liked your beginning of the story and you carried it on very well. It was a very good story and we liked it a lot because you used good descriptions, built it up well and it was a story that people would like to carry on reading.
7. Aidan | February 13th, 2007 at 9:45 am
Great story and loads of descriptions.I also liked the ending.
8. Amanda | February 13th, 2007 at 9:46 am
Very interesting because the way you described it well. your spelling was ok but it sounded like it was a bit rushed at the start.
9. Iona and Scott | February 13th, 2007 at 9:46 am
We like the story very much because it was scary and interesting.
It could have more explainions.
10. Samantha,Danny | February 13th, 2007 at 9:46 am
That was a good story. I like the way you have described the crash . I like the bit where you said you saw dead bodys under water. You could have said I went under and I looked for a second but I thought I saw a dead body.
11. Stacey&Alison | February 13th, 2007 at 9:46 am
I thought it was a really superb idea it made me feel like i was in the story and i would luv 2 read more about the story it was fab!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fae stacey & Alison
12. Demi,Cameron | February 13th, 2007 at 9:47 am
We thought your story was really good and interesting. We both really enjoyed what happened and we don’t think there was anything wrong with it. We were both very scared and we both felt like it was happening to us. Hope you get good comments on your blog!!!!
13. rhys | February 13th, 2007 at 9:47 am
Great story sean
14. Sandi | February 13th, 2007 at 5:30 pm
Your story gave me the shivers Sean. It is like all good stories when you want to read the next chapter to see what happens next and get some answers to your questions?
I think that you are a talented writer with the ability to grip your audience.
Well done.
15. Anonymous | February 20th, 2007 at 10:16 am
Good writing keep it up!!!!! Mohammed
16. Mohammed | February 20th, 2007 at 10:27 am
Hi Sean keep it up well done you are a star!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
17. dean | March 5th, 2007 at 2:35 pm
sean i like ur story and i want to read on keep it up sean
18. jamie | March 5th, 2007 at 2:37 pm
sean i like your ending well done
19. Seaton | May 21st, 2007 at 11:04 am
gd story
20. lorna seaton | June 13th, 2007 at 12:47 pm
hye gd story
i want 2 read on keep going
lol
well done
21. kieran | June 20th, 2007 at 7:40 pm
get the third one written come on ur slow
22. the writer | October 7th, 2010 at 11:35 pm
im considering writing a 3rd if any1 else comments i will apart from my family
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